My world seems to be turning and turning and turning. People has endless things to say and endless things to do. And you know what? I've been feeling upset about everything. Whatever things are happening, they are not very happy things.
First of all, my sister in law took my shoebag and has yet to return me which I think she doesn't intend to because she passed me my brother's shoebag. Arrgghh... whatever.
Secondly, people have been commenting about my dressing and saying that I wear too low cut. Is it? How come I look in the mirror and it doesn't feel like it. I feel sucky.
Thirdly, my phone bill is extremely high which I have to pay my mummy back so now I'm thinking how to pay her back. I still want to do shopping. "REN" is the right word to use now. BUT I WANNA SHOP!
Forthly, I'm growing fat and I'm too lazy to exercise because I just feel so upset about everything.
Lastly, Lord, I'm praying that I will be healed so that when I go tomorrow to the doc everything will be ok. People telling me about insurance and money... whatever... I'm just stuffing myself with water because the medicine previously was giving me stomach problems. We'll just see how tomorrow.
Well, let's talk about other things than my so called upset life at this point of time. I'll get over it. I feel emotionally drained but I lift everything into His hands. Anyway, let's talk about love. Hahaha... :) God did ask us to love others and sometimes others have hurt us with their actions. Taking the risk to love again is hard because the person has hurt you and you can't love the person fully anymore because you put a wall of protection around yourself and you try your best not to say things that hurt that someone anymore.
According to C.S. Lewis, he said this...
"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket- safe, dark, motionless, airless- it will change. It will not be broken, it will become unbreakable, imprenetrable, irredeemable."
I decided to take the risk to love again. God has called us to love others and I would like to fulfill that call and move out of my comfort zone. It is a risk to love but as I lean on Jesus to love others, people may fail me but God will always comfort me.
